ATTN Swifties Taylor Swift, Mahomes, Buffalo Bills Song Is a Joke

As a Bills fan, I now know that Taylor Swift's most dedicated fans are babies just like Patrick Mahomes and Travis Kielce. Give me a break.

I did a light-hearted song parody about the Mahomes-Chiefs meltdown last Sunday and you would have thought I just used a 911 terrorist analogy to inspire the band.

"Taylor Swift Got Run Over By a Reindeer" is a parody song done to the original "Grandma Got Run Over" from the 80s, but it's more about the Mahomes meltdown during the Bills - Chiefs game last Sunday where fragile Patrick Mahomes finally found himself on the other side of a call that played a role in the outcome of a game.

Mahomes of course went nuts over the call, which was correct by the way, causing him to fall into an embarrassing tantrum one could only compare to a spoiled brat flailing on the floor of the snack isle of a Tops Market on any given Friday. Now, Taylor Swift fans are following suit.

The song dropped on Tuesday and since then, young Swifties have been sending me hate mail picking on everything from my looks to my inability to carry a tune - along with my obvious lack of talent.

I'm talking about some really mean girls - and boys.

"You suck!"

"Taylor has more talent in her pinky than you'll ever have in your old, ugly decrepit life."

"You're an assh#@le." (I like the short and sweet ones)

The insults have come in by the dozens, and some are more entertaining than others. What these young protectors of Time Magazine's Person of the Year don't realize is, I'm enjoying the insults and the more they complain, the more they spread the song around the country.

Going back to the fact that the song is more about Patrick Mahomes than Swift, it's possible that these complainers are actually Taylor Swift fans and also Kansas City Chiefs fans, which kind of makes sense because they really aren't used to losing.

I really feel like Mahomes has shown his true colors this week and I hope he's enjoyed feeling what it's like to be a Buffalo Bills player. As for Taylor Swift fans, I'll give you a pass - someday when you grow up, you'll understand - it's just a joke.

Listen to the song "Taylor Swift Got Run Over by a Reindeer" in the YouTube video below, as it was debuted Tuesday morning. I've also posted the lyrics below the video - notice the Swift song and ad campaign references,

(The song starts about 10 sec after you hit the play button)

Go Bills! Beat Dallas!

Taylor Swift Got Run Over By a Reindeer (lyrics)
(Original song, Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer - by Elmo & Patsy)

Taylor Swift got run over by a reindeer
While Patrick Mahomes had a melt down the other night
You can say there’s no such song as Calm Down
But we all know the referees got it right

She’d been drinking all the Kool-Aid
Thought her man Kelsey had just won
But when the referee yelled out off sides
Mahomes spoiled Bratty mouth began to run

He was being such a baby
He Bundled temper, tantrum and attack
As Kelsey was doing 2 things AT once
Taylor Swift had a reindeer run right up her back. (Up her back?)

Taylor Swift got run over by a reindeer
As Mahomes threw his helmet on TV
The NFL won’t know what to do without her
Fans hope she’ll SHAKE IT OFF before next week.

All together now…

Taylor Swift got run over by a reindeer
Now the NFL can put the game back on TV.
You can say there’s no such song as Karma
But as for me and Josh Allen we believe.....
Merry Christmas from Buffalo NY