Open Letter to Those Getting Married in New York State
We have all been to weddings before. Whether it's for a close family member or friend or someone not quite as close to you, we have been to them.
Some of us have been to our own weddings and if you have gotten married or more importantly, are in the process of getting married, then you know just how stressful it can be.
My fiancée and I have been engaged since 2019 and are getting married at the end of the month. The pandemic pushed back our wedding a year later than we wanted it to be, but that was fine because we were trying to save up some more money anyway.
However, I can safely say that I underestimated the amount of work goes into planning a wedding. It's really not a case of whether or not you are doing an expensive wedding either, although that does add more financial stress to it.
It's the countless little details that go into it, that has very little to do with finances. For those getting married in New York State, you have a wide variety of venues to choose from, especially since we have both the city wedding and countryside wedding at our disposal.
The invitation experience has been eye-opening.
Trying to narrow down the number of people will be invited, who gets a plus-one (who needs a plus-one), and keeping track of all of those factors while you try and work on other things during your wedding.
Maybe a long time ago it was simpler, but now with the 40-50-60 hour work week couples have, finding time to appropriately plan a wedding has been the most difficult aspect of being engaged.
There have been times we have missed sending a wedding invite and were messaged if he or she were invited? In reality, it was not because we decided that person wasn't invited, it was just being overwhelmed and missing details. You truly don't see how large your close and extended family tree is until you plan a wedding.
Those who live out of state is another aspect.
Here in Buffalo, we don't have nearly the number of direct flights as let's say New York City, so it's a bit harder for family members or friends who live out of state to get here in time for the wedding.
Being on a budget, we wanted warm weather for our wedding, so we picked August for that warmth. If you're planning a wedding in New York State and want to avoid cold weather, you really only have five months out of the 12 to choose from, which adds more stress, since many couples have the same thought process and many dates are unavailable.
Dates were already filling up for the month of August in 2022 when we booked in May of 2021 -- a full 15 months in advance.
To be clear, I have beyond happy I'm getting married and to the woman of my dreams. However, I do think family members and friends forget how stressful this time can be and that shouldn't be overlooked.
Congratulations to those getting married this year or have been recently engaged will be saying "I do" in 2023!